Opticraft Community
Discussion forum => Offtopic => Topic started by: corourke70 on April 11, 2011, 12:17:11 am
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Some of mine are: (these are all from family guy)
Guy on Airplane: Oh great, I always end up sitting next to a damn baby.
Stewie: What did you just say?
Lois: Stewie, stop fussing.
Stewie: Pipe down Lois. (Slaps guy on head.) Hey big man, turn around. Oh you can't hear me now. I was going to watch the movie, but forget it. For the next 5 hours, you're my bitch.
Stewie: Well, I'd love to stay and chat, but you're a total bitch.
Chris: Hey little dude, how about some ice cream?
Stewie: Yes I could go for a frozen treat right about now. But no sprinkles. And for every sprinkle I find, I shall kill you.
Stewie: Oh damn! Jeremy is still in the trunk! How long has it been, two weeks? Yeah, he's dead.
Quagmire (running through mall and accidentally into the camera room): Where am I, am I dead?
Security Guard: No, this is where we monitor all the dressing rooms in the mall so we can keep an eye out for shoplifters.
(Woman on Monitor has heart attack)
Quagmire: Oh my God! That one's having a heart attack! (Runs to womans dressing room.)
Quagmire: (Rubs womans chest and breathes in her mouth. Woman becomes conscious.)
Woman#2: That was amazing!
Woman#3: You saved her life!
Woman#4: Thank God you know CPR!
Quagmire: What the hell is CPR?
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Stewie:Luis
Stewie:Luis
Stewie:Luis
Stewie:Luis
Stewie:Luis
Stewie:Mom
Stewie:Mom
Stewie:Mom
Stewie:Momy
Stewie:Momy
Stewie:Momy
Stewie:Mama
Stewie:Mama
Stewie:Mama
Stewie:Ma
Stewie:Ma
Stewie:Ma
Stewie:Ma
Stewie:Mom
Stewie:Mom
Stewie:Mom
Stewie:Mom
Stewie:Momy
Stewie:Momy
Stewie:Mama
Stewie:Mama
Stewie:Mom
Luis: WHAAT!!!!!!
Stewie: HI!
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH
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*peter sticks finger into pencil sharpener*
peter: OUCH!
peter: hrmm...
*scene shows him unzipping his pants, then switches to his door*
peter: ARGH!!!
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What's with all the family guy? You should really go see some blackadder :P
P: I must say, Edmund, it was jolly nice of you to ask me to share your breakfast before the rigours of the day begin.
E: Well, it is said, Percy, that civilised man seeks out good and intelligent company, so that, through learned discourse, he may rise above the savage and closer to God.
P: Yes, I've heard that.
E: Personally, however, I like to start the day with a total dickhead to remind me I'm best.
EB is trying to sell his house
M: What about the privies?
E: Well, what we're talking about in, erm, privy terms is the very latest in front-wall, fresh-air orifices, combined with a wide-capacity gutter installation below.
M: You mean you crap out of the window.
E: Yes!
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Spongebob ftw!
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Favorite quote from South Park.
I will slap you until there are little red hand prints all over you're face!! *kid punched dad*
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The regular show:
Muscle man- "You know who taught Hi 5 to hotwire the car to get away with slacking off at work to not get in trouble with his boss?"
-awkward silence-
Muscle man-" My uncle john. Hes a mechanic"
Rigby- "Thats cool...."
Muscle man "You know who taught him?..MY MOM!!! OHHH YEH" -hi 5s ghost-
Trust me, its funnier when you watch it. http://youtu.be/jabhA6dG5H4 (http://youtu.be/jabhA6dG5H4)
Mostly coz its a kids program
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Easily archer. The show is so over the top its hilarious.
Archer: oh my god you killed a hooker!
Cyril: You mean callgirl.
Archer:No cyrill, when they're dead, they're just hookers!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujsRIJckjVA
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujsRIJckjVA)
or this one
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sOI1S1yjl7M&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sOI1S1yjl7M&feature=related)